all those times spent together
holding each other
facing the darkness
drowning out the sorrow
the music's blasting tonight
but we aren't even listening
a whisper of you breath, of a word, a voice
in my ear
or is it all in my head
a hesitant touch, never finished
friends?
ha
we don't even know how to be 'just friends'
trying so hard to
maintain the carefully woven lies
the promises that were doomed from
the moment we spoke them
fists clenched and eyes averted
shoulders brushing, knees touching
we're lying to each other
but even more
we're lying to ourselves
drowning in the words we've spoken
choking on the ones left unsaid
i'm waiting for your touch
waiting to heal
hearts beating fast, i can hear it
even over the drowning sounds of music
we can't pretend there's nothing wrong
or can we?
fingers lace, eyes meet
we're speaking in the silence
conversation drifts to nothing
not a word was spoken
finally, i break
"i love you."
'i love you, too.'
sealed with a kiss
finalized with tears
i can't get over all that is wrong with this pretty picture
because all i see is the inside
i can't see the outside, how innocent we look
how much we look and act like we belong together
in my heart i know we're meant to be...aren't we?
soul is screaming, heart clenching, mind contracting
can't breath, can't scream, can't think, can't cry
do you know the agony i suffer
just for these stolen moments where i can
pretend you're mine.....
i miss when i knew
the definitives were clear
it's been a long time since those days...has it really been 8 months already?
i wish i knew what to say
i wish i remembered to think of how to feel
you're more important than life to me, i could care less about myself
my other half of my heart and soul
my one true love, all i ever want to know
you're mine for this moment
i lie to hide what's destroying me in my mind
can you hold me for a moment
kiss away the tears?
can you tell me you still love me
or will you sit in silence, time drawing like eternity
so let me say this once and for all
i cannot make you chose for i made a wrongful choice
it was only 4 long months ago
yet i know in my mind i must
eve though my heart screams no
i'm bleeding on the inside
i wish i was bleeding out
but i stay here, wanting,m waiting for you
to tell me what will happen
if you chose one way, i'd end my life
the other, it would make my life the brightest it can be
i love you so much, can you just understand
you and i....are meant to be